Attitude of Gratitude

So, Thursday morning I was pretty strung out driving my boys to school.  Every morning seems to be a roll of the dice with those two -- some days are uneventful.  And then some days are just crazy.  Crazy like crying and teasing and poking and tormenting; crazy like I am in a parallel universe where people can be brought to their knees in fits of sadness or rage, just because someone "looked at me" or "made that noise" or "smiled at me." Sweet Jesus.

So I drop them off and pull out of the school parking lot and into the far lane to turn into Sheri's neighborhood.  I had put together a little care package and thought I would drop it off on the front porch.  I knew Sheri's experience post-chemo had been really grueling last time, and I assumed there was no way she would be up and about this soon out after her second treatment.  As I turn onto her street I pull over, thinking I would just send her a text to let her know I'd left something at her door; as I pulled out my phone I was surprised and thrilled with the message there:

Actually feeling pretty good this morning.  Saw Henry off to school with his first big project! Nausea and discomfort are minimal . . . hopefully this will last! Love u all! Thank you for the prayers and well wishes!

I felt something like a wave come over me:  of relief, of gratitude, of shame -- for indulging in my own silly dramas with my kids. Her happiness at seeing Henry off to school after I had just thrown my two to the curb gave me pause.

Mostly I was just SO thankful that her experience was better this time around.

I saw her briefly and she was laughing and joking around.  Silly Sam (who should be a child model, by the way) locked his mom out of the house as she saw me to my car, prompting more laughter from Sheri.

I hope this is how it will go from here on out . . .  Smoother sailing, lots of laughs.

~Bess